Destiny 15: Coastal Adventure

A number of years ago, I embarked on a journey with 3 friends to the coast for a one night break, which was actually just an excuse to get drunk and laugh, temporarily leaving the big bad world behind. The day of departure, which happened to be on Saturday, started at around 7am, I was the designated driver, which was unavoidable because I was actually the only one who could drive, so we set of with the sun our own personal surveillance camera. Whilst I had abstained from taking in alcohol the night before, for obvious reasons, my 3 companions had not and this being the case we had travelled a mere 20 miles when I had to stop the car so they could poison an innocent field with used beer! I swear I heard that poor field groaning in disgust as we drove off into the sunset. We had only driven for another 10 minutes when we stopped at a roadside cafe for tea and bacon butties. Again we set off and again we stopped so they could expel stale beer. After what seemed like a 300 mile road trip  we were about 10 miles from our destination when the car stopped! After some time I managed to get it going but it cut out again about a mile after we had passed the “Welcome to Skegness” sign. It started again but stopped at a set of lights which happened to be outside a large welcoming pub, so we pushed it into their carpark and went into the pub, but only after phoning a breakdown service, who informed us they would be with us in about an hour! Waiting for them to arrive was torture because I didn’t or couldn’t drink alcohol on the premise that I would be driving again soon, but my 3 companions could drink and relax, and quaff they did while I drank coke! Anyway, the breakdown service arrived after about one and a half hours, only to discover that they couldn’t start the car! So, after checking with the landlady of the pub that we could leave the car in their carpark, we arranged for them to come back on Sunday afternoon to tow us back home. That unfortunate incident actually worked in my favour because it meant I could fill my boots with beer with the knowledge that I didn’t have to drive home the following day. My 3 friends, Stuart, Melvin and Paul were on their 4th pint when I was able to sample my first cold one, and after enjoying the freedom to drink, we moseyed the short distance into the centre of the seaside town and found another pub, where we hatched our plan to find somewhere to stay for the night. It was decided that myself and Stu would take a walk to find somewhere to stay whilst Mel and Paul stayed in the pub keeping a keen, drunken eye on our overnight bags. The next post will explain the comedy of errors that happened during our overnight stay!

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