George Receives The Full Steve Monty

So every 30 minutes or so I would pop around to ‘Check’ that Steve was doing his fair share of the work, knowing full well that George would be doing the lions share!

A very funny episode unravelled on one occasion. I opened the patio door, and the aroma of faeces hit me full-on in the nose. Poor old George was at last taking a breather from playing Cinderella, with a steaming hot cup of tea teetering on his bottom lip with Steve sat in exactly the same position as he had been previously. I entered the living room and said “Phewwwww, something smells very funky in here”, which immediately alerted George, who stood up quickly, spilling tea on the floor. Steve remained motionless, looked at me and said “What smell”?

Then George confirmed what I could smell, so I moved stealthily around the residents until I pinpointed the culprit! Steve watched me intently (Clint Eastwood style) as I helped the culprit to his feet, at which point George took over, leading pepe le pew upstairs to the bathroom. I offered to help George, at which point Steve announced he would help, ordering me to go away in a high pitched shrill!

I could tell Steve was reluctant to take part on the cleaning process, so I told Steve that i didn’t mind helping out. At which point George insisted he didn’t need help. So i turned to Steve and told him (whilst trying to be serious) that I was bitterly disappointed in his work ethic, which drove him to take drastic action and chase me out through the patio doors.

At that point I returned to my work and left them alone for a while (But not to long) in fact George came around to talk to me a little later with a look of confusion painted across his face. I asked him if everything was ok and he replied by saying “You told me I was in good hands with Steve! I’m not being horrible but he’s f#$%g useless” I laughed whilst insisting that Steve was THE man to learn from.

He walked away from me promising he would “Get me back” which very nearly made me collapse on the kitchen floor with laughter!

I hope I’m not painting a bad picture of Steve because he is very good at his job, very reliable and able to handle any situation that crops up. However, I also knew through experience that he preferred to ease the newer members of staff in by throwing them in at the deep end so they understood from day one what they were in for!!!

The good thing for George was that Steve told him to go home at 8pm, after administering medication because Steve knew George had a 2 and a half hour drive home. George was reluctant to leave 2 hours early but Steve insisted.

I couldn’t help but have one last leg-pull as George popped his head in to say goodnight and promise to bring down vengeance upon me! I said “Goodnight, nice to meet you”. But as I unlocked the garden gate I said, with a very straight face ” I can’t believe you’re leaving Steve to work on his own, 2 hours early! Shame on you” George didn’t think I was joking and stated that he wouldn’t leave, that I was right, until I admitted I was only joking, at which point he growled with pretend anger and asked me if I really thought it was acceptable that he was leaving Steve to work alone, to which I jokingly replied “Well, to be honest, you haven’t really done anything anyway”. He looked at me seriously then laughed whilst calling me an “Infuriating twat”.

I actually waved him off whilst shaking my head to indicate disappointment whilst Steve stood by my side, slapped me on my back and said “He’ll never return “.

But return he has, several times in fact, armed with the knowledge not to work with me or Steve ever again!

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