Today’s Melancholic Visit and the Proceeding Toilet Dilemma During Work Hours

Today has been odd, Sad, awkward and I guess, a little bit funny!!

This morning, about 9am, I left the house to visit a client about 20 miles away. When I arrived, my client opened his door a tiny bit, just enough to see who it was, then ushered me in and locked the door behind me. Being locked in a house with a client is against policy rules, but it was pointless trying to explain that to him because of his lack of English and his mental health issues.

At this point, it’s important to tell you that he keeps a diary. He can’t spell properly, has a very loose grasp of the written language, has been mentally traumatised and is very childish. However, he tries to write down his thoughts and feelings in his diary. We usually go for a walk into the local community when I visit, which is enabling him to become accustomed to social exposure. This morning, he had no intention of leaving his house! He didn’t say a word to me, he just waved his hand for me to sit down, and then he sat down, staring at the floor, no movement or verbal communication whatsoever.

Whatever I spoke to him, he merely nodded his head or shook it from side to side. I asked to look in his diary because that is where I write down the times of my visits and where other people who help him communicate their activities with my client. He nodded permission so I picked it up and read it, looking for a clue to his behaviour.

In it, he had written that his nightmares had woken him up (As they always do)

The background information is briefly this. He comes from a middle Eastern country and has witnessed death and torture, which he had been subjected to. His family and friends have been slaughtered. When he arrived in England, his mental health was teetering on insanity. However, as time passed, his general sanity improved but he now suffers from amnesia. He can’t remember anything from his past but relives the traumas of his previous life in frequent recurring nightmares.

In his diary, I worked out that his most recent nightmare had involved watching people die and he was screaming. He also wrote he doesn’t understand it but he wants to remember. I looked at my client, and he was crying. I offered to leave him with his own thoughts, in peace, but he said, in broken English, please, sit with me. So I did, I sat with him for a nearly an hour in silence. Eventually, the time for me to go and I stood up. He stood up at the same time and walked to the door in front of me and unlocked it. I put my hand on his shoulder and told him that one day, things will be better for him. He thanked me and closed the door quickly.

After contacting his most trusted support worker and his social worker to inform them of his fragile mental state, I drove home crying for him.

Anyway, I drove home with the windows down and arrived home in a better state and logged into the system to record my visit. Then the sudden onset of rumbling bowels grabbed my attention! I ran into the downstairs toilet with my phone, and went through the motions whilst playing a game on my phone. When I had finished, I looked to where the toilet paper usually waits for me. It wasn’t there !! What was I supposed to do?!?!

We have two toilets in the house, upstairs and downstairs. I was still marooned in the downstairs toilet with the new batch of toilet paper undoubtedly sat mocking me from upstairs! Luckily, the downstairs toilet also has a shower just to the right, about 4 steps!! So, there was nothing else I could do but stretch to move the shower curtain and move as quickly as I could in a crouched position from toilet seat to edge of the shower. I managed that and managed to turn the shower on. But, or should I say ‘Butt’, reaching up for the shower head was a struggle! I managed it, all the time balancing in a crouched position with my jeans around my ankles. I tried to manoeuvre the shower head into position but it slipped and sprayed the whole of my back, arse and legs! Cursing and completely soaked, I cleaned said bottom hole and stood up dripping wet!! It was then that I realised the hand towel was NOT going to dry the whole of me, so I ran upstairs, wedding tackle swaying in the wind, jeans half way down my legs to find a bath towel!!!

Moral of this story is, remember to make sure both toilets have toilet paper in position before opening the bowels!!

45 thoughts on “Today’s Melancholic Visit and the Proceeding Toilet Dilemma During Work Hours

  1. That reminds me of my childhood. For the first six years of my life we lived on Park Street. The house had no bathroom, and only an outside toilet. I remember unashamedly shouting for the bog roll to be brought to me with what must have been a whole section of the street hearing my distress.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. That sounds like an exhausting day, John! I wish human beings could find a way to avoid war. The work of many lives is destroyed by war, and the human cost is much worse. You were certainly a comfort to that client…a good motivation to do a difficult job. ❀ Have a great day!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Oof. I just came from the other client story where he’s about to be evicted, and now this guy. I can’t wrap my mind around what they’ve been through, but they are so, so, so, so, so lucky to have you trying to help/helping. I have no words.

    As for the toilet, lol, abruptly switching topics, your adventure shoved you unceremoniously into the modern world, which your country and my country and I don’t know how many others–probably all western–are apparently sadly out of touch with, John, and that’s ablutions with a bidet! No toilet paper for the majority of the world! And Those of the Water look upon Us with the Wads of Paper with great pity and sadness, which I think is greatly deserved, lol !!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m not sure they’re luck to have to put up with my help 🀣 but I try my best.
      I know what you mean about the toilet paper v water battle. I travelled to Turkey just before the virus kicked in, and I loved the bidet. It was so hot during the night, I would sit on it just because it was there. Ahhhhhhhh cool water 🀣

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Wow. If there were more people in the world like you, it would be a much better place.

    Good call on the shower solution!! We also have two toilets. Last year my husband and son installed a new ‘Japanese style’ loo upstairs. It’s sensational!! Anyway, after dinner, there’s a rush in our house, while everybody tries to bolt to the ‘good’ toilet and the loser ends up on the normal toilet.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Japanese style? That’s a new one on me!! Does it play flute as it flushes or does it actually flush ? I can visualise the mad rush to the toilet, everyone trying to trip each other up to win the race 🀣
      Thanks for the compliment dear 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  5. It might all be worth an explanatory blog….if I can be bothered!
    He’s nearlly 94, has huge short-term memory loss and is very frail. So no real prospects of improvement, but he now has 3 humans and five cats as company in a house where he has rattled around alone for 15 years.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. This kind of puts my trauma in perspective


    Be aware that your exposure to things like this can lead to trauma of your own.

    Many cops, emt’s and emergency room nurses and doctors get PTSD.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Funny. You look youngish. So I can offer this: wait until you get old(er) and you plumbing sends mixed signals. I have a series of truisms I share. For example, “If you, old dude just blew your nose and you think you have some odd decoration hanging from your mustache – you do.” Whelp. “If you, old dude, just blew butt kisses and think there was something more to it – there was.” Aging is a great adventure – get used to it.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Such a respectful, thoughtful way to honor someone’s pain, John – to simply listen to them when they tell you what they need and follow through,. The shift from tears to humor in your day was quite a rapid change, and your ability to laugh at your second situation with a sense of humor no doubt helped balance out deep sorrow over things you cloud not change. The description of your final adventure made me laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

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