So, where was I, ahhh yes, bleeding eyes!!! I can’t remember the last time my eyes bled, maybe it was the last time Musslini blacked them with a frying pan for not following orders, but I can’t remember. (Only a joke Angie!) I’ve blocked most of that particular traumatic event from my mind. Before I go on, I want to say that I am not recounting this ‘Event’ because I want to embarrass or ‘Shock’ anybody. That is NOT my intention, it’s just that I’ve heard talking through disturbing events helps the mind and the eyes heal. It’s also because it’s just to funny to leave out. It will also come as a surprise, so again, no offence intended. I also want to share my pain!!
So, Stuey and I were deep in conversation about something meaningful (Haven’t got a clue what, so it was probably not meaningful) Angie was somewhere in the caravan doing what she does best (Goose stepping) Mellie was outside smoking a cigarette and probably looking for somewhere secluded to indulge in a quick ham shank. Jackie came wandering (Innocently) into the living area where me and Stuey were talking. I looked casually to the side ever so briefly, nodding my head in agreement with something Stuey said, and was smacked in the eyes with the sight of Jackie pulling a jumper/cardigan up or down (I’m not sure which) over her head. I was met with the sight of one of her boobs hanging freely (And I mean HANGING) her nipple saying hello to the waist of her trousers!! (I didn’t know that was possible) I suppose it’s a bit like an older man’s ball sack touching his socks, (I’ll ask It’s Lovely)
I looked on, briefly stunned, and tried to carry on the conversation with Stuey, but I was struck dumb. I think I blinked a couple of times at Stuey, and I think he asked me if I was alright. (I couldn’t answer, I just stared, blankly) Angie appeared and came to sit next to me. I looked at her and asked her “Are my eyes bleeding “? She actually answered me and said “No, why”? I couldn’t answer, I simply repeated the question, which prompted Stuey to ask me if I was ok. I shook my head, rubbed my eyes and thought of beautiful things, like daffodils and buttercups and rainbows and even Mellie having a ham shank, but it didn’t work, my melted brain continued to force invisible blood to run from my eyes!! After a few minutes, we left the caravan and made our way towards the markets and pubs. I didn’t say anything to anybody about the assault on my eyeballs, I didn’t know how to say anything, until now!! Looking back, I probably should have said something then and there, because we would have laughed, but as I said, I was dumbstruck. Anyway, I haven’t written this to embarrass anybody but it was a typical ‘It’s A Carry On’ moment that I couldn’t let go without a mention. I repeat, I haven’t mentioned this to embarrass Jackie or Stuey, they know we love them (But NOT in a nipple sharing way) Anyway, this is just a short post, dedicated to the memory of firmer, upstanding tits and balls. I’ll write the 4th and last part when my eyes have stopped bleeding!!!
You know Skegness is a nordic name, and it just struck me that “skaeg” in Danish means fun and/or funny, but … it also means beard. Which is weird … 😉 … What on earth were the vikings thinking of?
I can’t comment on the other stuff, my eyes are bleeding just from reading … unfortunately I have a vivid imagination.
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🤣🤣 sorry for making your eyes bleed.
I didn’t know that about Skaeg Ness. Interesting
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Eyes also bleeding – difficult to scrape it away but wouldn’t have it any other way – a very memorable tale
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Thanks Kate. You had to be there to appreciate the full horror and humour in the situation
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No Thankyou 😁
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plz follow me and like and me followed you ❤️🙏
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I’m following you Mr Jay 😊
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tnq sir ❤️🙏 and other follow me
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Stories like that is what gets you followers who like to keep abreast of your stories. There’s only that would write about that. 😱
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🤣 yea, maybe you’re right Chris
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What attracted me to your blog were also the other stories, those about your family and those about your job and your clients. There is so much love and concern for other people shining through.
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Really? Thank you Stella, that means a lot to me ❤
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Yes, really! 🙂
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I heard someone actually got some stitches for eye injury. I’m relieved that you can now talk about it with humor because it’s all OK now, right? And sorry, I know I should be sorry for the eye bleeding but I think I laughed more in the paragraph of nipples🤣
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🤣 it’s fine. They only bleed when I imagine the nipples
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Once seen, things can never be unseen.
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Correct Kev. My eyes are streaming blood
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Yes…unfortunately…it is a very real thing!
Thanks for the laugh!
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Thanks Lorrie 😊
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Bleeding eyes? No wonder women my age can’t get a date: all the men are afraid to see us naked. 🤷♀️
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No offence intended Jen. We (Me Jackie Stu) have been friends for many years and take the mick out of each other constantly.
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Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford.
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Thanks very Jonathan, appreciated 👍
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YOU are very much appreciated!
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Stuey and I were deep in conversation about something meaningful (Haven’t got a clue what, so it was probably not meaningful)
Ha! The number of conversations I’ve had like that!
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We’ve all had those conversations mate, especially when drunk.
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LOL! Classic !!!
I’m trying to think of something that made MY eyes bleed but can’t remember anything. I would say the other way happened: I used to live in an apartment with a male friend. One day I thought I was alone and came out of the shower and into the hallway without a towel, and there he was, mouth open, frozen. I MIGHT say his eyes were bleeding, but since I was about 25, I’ll say he was, instead, frozen with unexpected arousal, lol !! TODAY, though, his eyes would be bleeding !!!
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Lol I can imagine that, frozen with arousal lol
I’m sure his eyes would pop out without the bleeding 😉 😜
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Gravity is nobody’s friend, lol !!! 🙂
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;>)
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Did you ever think of doing stand up comedy, John? 😉
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I wouldn’t have the guts mate 🤣
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Oh! My! Bwahahahahaha!
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Thanks for the visual of the hanging nipple! I wish I had waited to sip my coffee! LOLOLOLOL
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🤣🤣 sorry
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I keep reading one post after another, each one making me laugh harder then the last. 🤣🤣
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Thank you, happy you’re laughing 😃
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