Viva Skeg-Vagas Part 4

We stumbled towards the first port of call (The Oasis Bar) with blood obscuring my vision. Mellie ‘It’s Lovely ‘ walked slightly to the front of us (Trying not to step on Jackie’s low swingers) giving us a perfect view of something poking up towards the sky (Not his tallywackle) it was a small pointy volcano on his shoulder, something he had made us aware of earlier in the day. The story goes like this. He had fallen over a few weeks or months ago (couldn’t remember) and ever since the fall, a ‘Lump’ had appeared on the top of his shoulder. He foolishly allowed me to poke it with my fingers, which is something I continued to do for the rest of the time we were in Skeg-Vagas. To be honest, the mysterious lump felt like bone. I expressed my thoughts to Mellie and asked him if it was painful, to which he moved his shoulder in all directions, swung his arm around like a windmill and told us it didn’t bother him. I suggested he might have dislocated or even broken something and it had reset itself into a tiny volcano. He briefly looked ever so slightly concerned then shrugged it off. With tounge in cheek, I asked him if it interfered with his extra curricular activities during the night. Remarkably, he actually answered, saying “No, not really”!! In all seriousness, we all advised him to go to the doctors with it or to take himself to A and E. He didn’t say yes or no, he just shrugged (Making his little volcano stand up and point) and said he might do. (He hasn’t)

So, we meandered around the market stalls and pubs and became mesmerized with Mel’s pointy thing. One of the incidents that steered our gaze away from Mel and caught our attention happened after Jackie had bought Stu a hoodie. It was breezy on the coast and Stu had made the executive decision not to bring a coat or jumper. So Jackie bought Stu a hoodie from one of the shops without telling him and we walked up to the sea front, sat down and soaked up the sound and sight of the waves crashing in front of us. It was during this relaxing, meditative moment that Jackie revealed her hoddie present to Stu. We realised it was to small when he struggled to squeeze his head through the opening. Nevertheless, he persevered and eventually slipped it over his ears. Then, unbelievably, he carried on with the battle to get his arms in and pull it down to just above his navel. The struggle tired him a little so he sat down, the wetsuit tightness of the hoddle making it impossible for him to sit comfortably and relax. Then Stu proclaimed “It’s to small, mellie, help me get it off”. Without any hesitation, Mel took hold of the bottom of the hoodie and pulled and pulled and pulled (Something he’s used to) partially lifting Stu of the bench with every tug, which was accompanied with a “Uggghhh” from Stu every time he levitated off the seat. By this time, we were all laughing and Mel was crying with laughter, occasionally pausing with the pull to hold his sides and say “Oooo my sides”, which made us laugh more, even Stu laughed between “Uggghhhs” , who was firmly trapped in the hoodie straight jacket!! Eventually, Mellie freed Stu, who emerged red faced but triumphant.

After we had settled down from all the laughter, we walked down to a Bar called Buddies, which is very popular for 2 reasons. 1, the beer is very good and quite cheap and 2, they have live acts to give it a seaside party atmosphere. It was there that the funny incidents really took off, but I’ll leave that for another time.