I haven’t been able or felt the need to write anything on here for quite a long time for a number of reasons. My ‘New’ job has taken over most of my time (Even when I’m not working, I’m thinking about it and how I can do it better) Also, I’ve been under the weather for quite a while and I just haven’t ‘Felt it’ if you know what I mean! There’s more important things to life than writing!
My family and friends have been directly and indirectly affected by covid and lost loved ones to this bloody virus. One very close friend was hit by a car in a hit and run and died. She was on her way back home to her husband after working a shift in a nursing home. Anne never made it home. It knocked everyone for six. Still can’t believe it! Still can’t believe she’s gone! I’m not religious, but if there is a God, Why !!!
So, you can see it’s been difficult, but I guess no more difficult than it has been for thousands of others.
However, funny incidents can come from tragedy.
A friend of the family lost his mum during lockdown, she died of ‘Natural causes ‘. She was cremated, as was her wish. What with the rules surrounding funerals, not many people were allowed to pay their respects. Her ashes were taken home, and sat on the fireplace, taking pride of place, i guess, giving her son and our friend Dave a sense of comfort and closeness.
The weeks went by and Dave asked his wife Christine, if she would go with her sister-in-law to the cemetery and scatter his mother’s ashes over his father’s grave. (Dave is very unstable on his legs and has to move around on an electric scooter. He also suffers from chronic lung disease, which has made him suceptible to covid and afraid to leave his house)
Of course, Christine said yes and a few days later, walked to the cemetery with Jackie, her sister-in-law, the urn safely tucked away in Christine’s coat pocket, wrapped in a silk scarf, Jackie carrying a large bunch of flowers.
At the graveside, Christine thought it would be a loving gesture to dig a small hole at the head of the grave to place the whole urn into, so they could be together in their entirety. They did exactly that, placing the soil over it and patting it so it was compact and safe.
When they stood up, Jackie mentioned that she was worried they had just broken the law, saying she was sure they needed permission to bury the urn with the name and date still on it because it would be classed as a burial!! Christine went into panic mode and dug the urn back up, again replacing the soil. Then she opened the top of the urn and started to sprinkle the ashes over the top of the grave. The wind changed direction and blew the lady’s remains in different directions. Christine explained this to me, whilst trying to look sombre but every few seconds a mad giggle escaped, along with a high pitched laugh. She said when she looked over her shoulder, Jackie was moving her head in jerky movements, one of her eyes closed. Some of the ashes had blown directly into her face and mouth, and her hair had changed colour, from a dark brown to ash grey. She explained she felt ashamed but they both started laughing hysterically.
Christine admitted that Dave’s mum would have seen the funny side.
So you see, even in moments of tragedy, it’s possible to smile.
Anyway, I thought I’d share this with you. By the way, Dave will never know.
Enjoyed reading your writing mixed with tragedy and comedy. Hope you and family are staying safe and well.
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Thank you Krishna ๐ yes, we’re doing ok now thanks. Hope you’re safe and well?
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Yes, we are safe in Almighty’s grace ๐
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Itโs good to see another one of your excellent posts again John. Iโve also not written much for a while, mainly due to lack of inspiration. Iโll probably do some more to expand on my last personal post, which youโll understand if you read it.
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I will read it mate, just not been on here for a while ๐
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Itโs on the Whippet Man
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OK, I’ll have a looksee
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That has been a very rough time. It is good that you can now laugh
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Life just carries on Derrick.
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Hilarious
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Thanks Ananda ๐
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Hope things are improving!
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Yes they are thanks Mags ๐
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Welcome back John lovely to hear from you. โคโค
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Thank you love, it’s good to be back. Don’t know how long for but I’m here right now โค
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Good to see you back, but Iโm sorry to hear things have been so hard for you. Hope things are getting better now. I enjoyed the story, and hope for your sake Dave doesnโt read your blog ๐
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Thanks Clive, and he definitely doesn’t read this ๐คฃ
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Just as well!
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๐คฃ How’s things with you and yours Clive ?
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Generally ok thanks, much less eventful than things have been for you and your family. Hope the new job is going well and is what you wanted it to be.
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Good, glad you’re ok ๐ The new job is 12 weeks old now, very intense but very enjoyable ๐
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Pleased to hear youโre enjoying it, hope it stays like that!
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So do I mate ๐
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I would be grossed out if that happened to me, but I would learn to laugh at myself. I hope you’re feeling better.
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Yes thanks Ang, I’m doing ok now ๐
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These are, indeed, difficult times in which we are hit with unexpected losses. Glad that you are still able to smile in the midst of it all ๐
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Thank you Rosaliene, my smile is a coping mechanism.
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You’d be surprised how much can change when we just smile โค
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I guess so ๐ How are you?
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Glad to read youโre doing better and your smile is back, thanks for sharing the urn โฑ๏ธ tale, it is the sort of thing my Nana would do and I was thinking of her and smiling as I was reading.
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Really ๐คฃ your nan must have possessed a great sense of humour Charlotte ๐
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My Nana is still here John, she just loves to walk around the local crematorium and look at the flowers and messages and generally stroll through all the remembrance gardens. She has got a great sense of humour though.
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So sorry about your and your friends’ losses, John, but glad you’re all able to laugh and move on, as well.
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Thanks Mitch. Sometimes, it’s all we can do.
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True indeed.
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I guess those things actually DO happen, as evidenced from your friends. It is nice to lighten up in the midst of all that’s going on. At least your job is still great and you’re inspired enough to think of ways to do it better!
Similar situation with me and hubby: we were hiking on a tall mountain years ago with his father’s ashes that hubby went to spill over the side, but when he turned, we bumped each other on the trail, both of us somehow teetering on the edge and one of us about to plummet to our death down below. THAT would have been a two for one that day, if that had happened! I laugh about it years later. But hubby doesn’t.
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Holy cow, that sounds like a close call Sel.
How’s things in your neck of the woods?
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BTW, it was nice to hear from you. We’re doing well here–can’t complain! We’ve heard some sad stories from friends and acquaintances concerning their friends and/or family, but me and hubby’s families (and friends) have escaped unscathed, it seems. We are exceedingly lucky (KNOCK ON WOOD!)
The idiotic irony of the universe, tho–to be a caring person working in healthcare who survives this past year, only to be brought down by a hit-and-run?! Why, indeed!! I could add a few choice swear words after that, too, aimed a specific mysterious force. But I shouldn’t go there. We’re focusing on endorphins and feeling better, not trying to solve an unsolvable puzzle!
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Good to know you, hubby and friends are safe n well ๐
It was a very strange day when Anne was killed. I was sitting down at home, working on the laptop before going out to do my visits when my son came walking in from work. He had been on a bus that was delayed because of a traffic accident. He walked in and said there was an ambulance and police stopping traffic at the bottom of the road where we live. We thought nothing of it until my daughter ran to tell me Anne had been hit by a car and has driven off.
We couldn’t believe it. She died on the way to hospital.
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I’m lost for words Dear John my heart breaks. Shalom๐๐๐
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Thank you ๐ and Shalom โค
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I’m so sorry, of course. My condolences. It’s unbelievable, really.
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Sorry Sel, I went on a little bit there. Didn’t mean to bend your ear.
It’s good to hear from you ๐
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Not at all! No bending here. Good to hear from YOU. ๐
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hard to find humour in such times, but yes, it’s possible to smile ๐
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It’s impossible to know how you’re going to react in certain situations. Even when you don’t want to smile, sometimes it just happens.
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True!!
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There is always humor in life, even in death. My heartfelt condolences to you – two of my family died of Covid-19. I wanted to scatter my mum’s ashes in the Atlantic coast off the north of Scotland but made my husband do it. The wind lashed the ashes back on him, much of them going in his mouth. We laughed hysterically and my mum lives on forever in him…
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I’m sorry for your loss โค it’s destroyed many lifes. What can we do but try and cope in the best way we can.
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Thank you.
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I noticed you had gone quiet and wondered what had happened. Now I know. I hope things pick up for you. Stay safe.
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Thanks Mick ๐ I think it’s all settling down now.
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๐ค
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So sorry to hear about your struggles. That is so sad about your friend. We have been having a lot of hit and runs here in Arizona too. I posted about it in my updates post. I fear for the ugliness that is out there in the world but there are still good people too. I believe your friend’s mother would have laughed at that funeral scene too. It made us all smile and laugh here so thank for that, we all definitely need more of that. Have a beautiful peaceful week. Stay safe out there.
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Ciao
I am very sorry for the bad time you lived,
I had noticed your absence
I’m glad you’re back to writing
It is very nice for me to read you
I wish you all the best
Monica
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Thank you Monica, that’s a nice thing to say. I may not be around much to write but I appreciate your sentiments. ๐ Hope you’re safe and well?
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I’m fine
thank you
๐
I wish you a peaceful day
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Thank you. Wishing you the same
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Good to see a post from you John and knowing you are fine.
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Thanks very much Rupali ๐๐
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How are you?
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I am fine thank you.
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Sorry things have not been going too well for you and the family, John. The story of the ashes reminds me of Samuel Beckett, his novel, ‘Murphy.’ He dies and his ashes somehow get scattered over the floor of a pub! Take care!
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Thanks Peter. I haven’t read that novel.
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Truly shocking about your friend Anne. Itโs bad enough hitting someone with a car, but to not stop and help is just terrible. I am sorry for your loss. I think these shocking deaths are quite difficult to process.
I am from the UK but live in Germany, and watched in horror as Covid ravaged through the UK. A close friend lost her mum to Covid on Christmas Day (sheโd picked it up in hospital after falling and breaking her hip) and then my best friend lost her partner on Boxing Day (also Covid). That was such as shock as he was fit and healthy all his life and was only in his mid forties. By New Year we had over 20 close friends and relatives sick with it all at the same time. I felt so helpless. But you canโt do anything. Just text and call and hope. One friend got really sick and ended up in intensive care. So we were really holding our breath for a bit, but he did luckily recover.
Humour in difficult circumstances is so important. Iโm sure Daveโs mum would have appreciated the moment!!
My ex MIL (who we all absolutely adored) died a couple of years ago. My four children, second husband and I all went over to the funeral. My MIL, who had a fabulous sense of humour would have loved the whole scenario. Every time I think of it, I can hear her laughing in my head.
Firstly, the day before the funeral we took the kids for a walk and my youngest climbed on a boulder and promptly fell off, breaking her arm. Which meant she attended the funeral in a full arm cast (thank God weโd picked a short sleeve dress before weโd left). My son, who is autistic insisted on wearing his firemanโs suit. Not the one he fights fires in (phew!!). Maybe I should explain: my son has ADHD and autism and is a voluntary fireman โ you may think this doesnโt fit together, but actually itโs a perfect fit: the ADHD makes him brave and the autism makes him focus on the rules and all the little things that no one else notices. Anyway, he has several suits, one of which is for official events like meeting the mayor or going to funerals. But really itโs for official funerals like of other firefighters. So he insisted he had to wear it to the funeral. Cap and all. I swear if she was watching, she was laughing.
Then my ex-husband spent the whole wake chatting to and drinking beer with my second husband!!
Stay safe and well!
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๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ now that is very funny in a tragic way. Sorry for the late reply, I don’t get to come on here much, just to goddam busy.
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No problem at all. I disappear for months at a time at times.
It was funny. My ex- MIL had a fabulous sense of humour to, so it seemed somehow very appropriate.
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There are definite similarities ๐คฃ
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For me, Sometimes writing works as venting out from overthinking! Our mind either thinks of the past or future and thus leaving a void of the present. Take care!
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That’s an interesting way of looking at it buddy ๐ Thanks for comment and take care of yourself.
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Reblogged this on My Blog.
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Thank you Craig, appreciated ๐
Hope you’re well? I don’t come on here much anymore. I’m very busy with work.
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well, yes… but sane – not so sure! a pleasure and don’t work too hard
enjoy the weekend, John
“waking up early bird sleepy-head” c
Reaching people from the bottom of the world (at not the world of your bottom…
hopefully!)
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I do NOT know how I managed to miss this blog post ๐ฆ But I sure am glad that I thought of you this morning, and stopped by to visit your page.
I am sorry to hear of your losses – this Covid thing is just so mean in so many ways ๐ฆ
I absolutely and thoroughly appreciate the ability to still find humour in the tragedies though… loved the comment of how the deceased would have found it amusing too. In our sadness, we sometimes forget little things like that โค
You are very much missed… but I am glad work is keeping you busy and out of mischief ๐
I think of you often and offer up a small request for a good day for you.
Keep well, my friend.
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cool
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Very nice blog indeed!! I also published a blog with the same thought just a few days back. It often happens in our life that we find humour in tragedy. Please read if not read yet. And don’t forget to post your valuable comments. Thanks๐
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Hello and thanks Anita. ๐ sorry it’s taken so long to reply, I don’t get much time to come on here at the moment. I will definitely read your post.
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No problem John. Thank you.
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Just a note to say hi and let you know you’re missed ๐
Hope all is going well โค
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Hello love. Lovely to hear from you ๐ and thanks for saying that โค jobs going well but I’m under the weather at the moment.
How are you?
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Great to hear that the job is going well… not great that you are under the weather!!!!
We’re plodding along, and I’m still smiling, even if sometimes I’d rather cry ๐
Here’s hoping you have a fantastic week x
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Welcome back John ๐ป๐๐ท๐ณ๐ฒ๐ด๐ด๐
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Hi, I’m not really back love, it was just something I wanted to write about. But thank you ๐
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Return and write; your words can help with healing; return and write!
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Good morning Jo ๐ What does that mean luv ?
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Hi John
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Hi Alice
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Nice to meet you
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Likewise ๐
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The beauty of WP Community โบ๏ธ
I can’t tell you how much I tried to keep a straight face too and not burst out laughing.
It’s 1:59am where iam, all is quiet outside and I happen to share the room with my mom. I can’t imagine what she would have thought, hearing my sudden rapture of laughter๐
Thank you so much for sharing๐
And of course, Dave will never know๐
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Lol happy it made you want to laugh ๐
Where in this bloody big/small world do you live? Hope you’re safe and well?
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Here in the quiet beautiful spaces of East Africa ๐
Am safe, thank you.
Hope you keeping safe too.
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Wow, East Africa. It even sounds beautiful.
Happy you’re safe and well ๐ I’m fine thank you.
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๐ thank you.
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forgot to add to my comment above just posted
Don’t worry about the world ending today
it’s already tomorrow in scenic and tranquil ‘little’ New Zealand
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Hello from the UK
Thank you for your post. I am very sorry to hear about your mum’s friend.
You say ‘…her hair had changed colour, from a dark brown to ash grey.’ I suppose that is what they mean by ‘Ash blonde’?!
When my mother died her remains were cremated. They were interred in Scotland where there is a family grave. My wife and I drove up to the funeral and took the urn with us in the boot of the car.
I think it was visiting my aunt briefly on the way when she had said she missed my mother. We were on the settee and my wife said quietly to me words to the effect of ‘Shall we tell her she’s in the boot!’ It was hard not to laugh.
My mother would have liked that very much.
Kind regards
Baldmichael Theresoluteprotector’sson
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